Have I ever mentioned that I am not a relationship counselor and that I am just the average girl who doesn’t know how to stop talking about what she thinks?
I wonder if my relationship segment is worth your while though. So I will just go straight to the point fam.
Physical attraction is over important in a relationship.
When I didn’t know what fellowship I should be sticking with, I was at one where they fed us all sorts. Fam, all sorts. It was one thing to must have seen your woman or man in a vision to be convinced. It was another to be stuck with a man you weren’t necessarily attracted to all because he is supposed to be the man.
There is the other confusing one. This guy approaches you and you know deep down that he is a good man.
He possibly has everything you want in a man and he is a child of God to top it all. But, you are not sure you would allow him to kiss you. But that’s even too far. You are not sure you want to even look him in the face.
He is so not your type physically. The attraction is so very dead. Oh, I have been there a lot of times so I understand how it feels to have a good man you are not attracted to. I think it sucks a lot if you ask me.
For times when I tried and kept on trying to be with someone just because he is a good man, I ended up feeling sad for myself. I even think it is unfair because you cannot give them your all.
Physical attraction really does matter especially if you are ever going to bear children. How would I moan under a man I am not physically attracted to when it’s time? Like, so sorry plix. You can spray that paragraph with anointing oil.
Attraction seems to me like the foundation for so many other things in the relationship. For all I know, it is the first kind of attraction that happens; it is like the springboard.
If that part goes bad, mhen, I don’t know how the rest is gon work. Just saying.
So these folks that say that the attraction is going to come later, I don’t know what they mean. Or actually, I think I know what they mean, kind of.
So I know that as women, good nurturing is capable of causing us to become attached and receptive. A man who is loving and kind and selfless, with time can cause a woman to fall hopelessly in love if he is reasonably constant.
Please let me explain what I mean by ‘reasonably constant’. There is every possibility that a man is reading this and I want all of us to not go and be confusing ourselves. Loooool.
If a girl outrightly rejects you and you keep on pursuing for years, you are not being reasonably constant o. In fact, the babe already sees you as a pest. I am not so sure why I am very unlucky but I have told some folks that I am not ready to be in a relationship with them. One of them still pursues, two years later.
It’s possible he is also chasing other girls and stuff but his constant sticking around and all have become very disgusting. His chats, presence, everything, gets me angry.
I once told him that I have done everything I can to be clear and plain and his constant nudging is not going to change my mind. If for anything, it is making it worse. I really do not want to be with him but as it is, he has no idea what being constant with a woman means. In short, he is being very unreasonable.
I guess that’s out of the way now, needed to be sure we are all on the same page.
Another thing to consider is whether your physical spec is reasonable. What is influencing your definition of your ideal man? Seven packs or I don’t know.
I think the Internet is doing an evil job at defining ideals. The funny thing too is that ideals are not even constant.
The other day I was on Instagram and this babe was all natural, very beautiful babe like that. In the video, she said she never ever thought that her big lips would ever become a standard. According to her, she was mocked a lot while she was growing up.
We are in 2019 and people are going to fill their lips! This is where I am going, be reasonable in your choice of physical attributes to be attracted to.
It’s okay to want tall, dark and handsome. I mean who doesn’t want TDH? I want TDH though, but I don’t mind if he comes light and I like his vibes enough. I know that physical attraction has a lot to do with our own personal definition of ideals but I am asking that you carefully look at what you are focusing on.
What am I saying?
Physical attraction is very very important for a relationship to work, else there will be a lot of issues but so is being realistic and reasonable. Because there will be years down the line and you won’t ever remember six packs or beard gang.
Be nice enough to yourself to get you a man you are attracted to but this judgment of attraction comes right after thoroughly subjecting your specs to reality and truth and objectivity.
What do you think? Is physical attraction important for a relationship to work?