The following is an excerpt from Michelle McKinney Hammond’s book – The Diva Principle – Secrets to Divine Inspiration for Victorious Attitude.
As I explore more on self care and all of the negative feedback it has gained because it appears unrealistic and selfish, I go back to re-reading one of Michelle Hammond’s powerful books and I find something to address it.
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“Now can we talk about those who are addicted to over performing? Constantly being on the go does not add up to good exercise. It adds up to high stress levels that cause the body to rebel against us.
Everything from glandular problems to fibroids to a host of other common “female problems,” are now being attributed not just to our diets but to our heightened stress levels.
Our bodies are pleading with us to slow down and yet many are guilty of ignoring the warning signs. Believe me, if you do not listen to your body, it will have the last say.
Stop! Breathe in, breathe out, and sit down. Put your feet up. Enjoy a moment of silence and do absolutely nothing. Pay attention to how much sleep your body says it needs and learn to say a very small but difficult word, “No.”
No to the constant invitations and activities that all sound good. When done continually, these activities and obligations wear you down and make you a very unpleasant person with shorter and shorter amounts of patience.
In all things, pursue peace. Peace for your mind, peace for your emotions, peace for your spirit, peace for your body. Make discerning choices about what you say yes to and consider their long-term effects. Ask yourself: Is this something that is going to wear me out? Or make me wonder why I agreed to it?
If the answer to both of those questions is yes, you need to learn to shake off the bondage of false obligation – making everyone happy except yourself – and say no. Take the time to love yourself and you will find it easier to love others. And guess what? They will love you back.
It is vital that you make a daily effort to nurture your body, mind and soul. As nurturers, we always find it difficult to ask for help – even if we desperately need it.
Esther was given seven maids to assist her. Women find it hard to admit when they need help. We are the masters of multitasking. Many would never voice out loud that they are resentful after saving the day for countless others.
Overextended and under appreciated, they crawl into their beds at night wondering why no one ever comes to their rescue. Never admitting that their addiction to caregiving is in overdrive, they literally push themselves to the brink of exhaustion and then blow up, much to the shock of their inner circle who assumed they enjoyed helping everyone.
Sound familiar? It’s time to get real about how much you are really capable of. Go ahead, admit it, “My name is not Superwoman!” Stop the madness of overextending yourself.
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Divas know their physical limitations and take time to rest. The have no problem asking for help when they need it and saying no when a yes won’t do anyone any good.
They are forever cognizant of nurturing their well-being, knowing ill health would render them ineffective, unable to do anything for themselves as well as others. One of the greatest gifts you can give yourself is the knowledge of when enough is enough.
I will no longer be unrealistic about my physical limitations. I will take the time to rest and renew myself so I can be of better service to others as well as myself. I will be honest about my needs and seek help when needed. I will value myself and nurture my health and well-being. “
Related : How to say No without feeling guilty