I never really attach too much importance to holidays. It’s the same with special dates. It’s January 1st, oh great, that’s just another day. I have friends who send me happy new month messages and I say to myself, o boy, when am I ever going to be conventional?
I have tried so hard to be traditional. I have tried to exaggerate birthdays. I have really tried and so far so good, it’s not working. Really.
This holiday, however seems a little bit different. Not like I am sure I am going to wish you a merry Christmas anyway. It’s just that, I want to be/ I am more present.
In a way…
Here’s what I plan to do / begin, starting from this holiday.
Practise more self compassion
I first heard about this from Daniela Uslan’s email. By the way, I don’t know what I would do if there was no blatantly, absolutely, radically real Blogger as that woman.
I have been too hard on myself. I scold myself too hard, expect too much, put down myself and threaten me a lot. I am all about goals goals goals and there is so much of punishment for goals not attained. This makes me grumpy and ungrateful.
I need to speak kinder words to myself like I would to a grieving friend. I am resolving to softly talk to my being, be more compassionate and loving. I am resolving to understand that I am human and that humans fail.
Believe more in my brand
I spend a lot of time chasing bigger and more established brands to collaborate with. I shy away from talking about this because it’s like my shame. I can be a little bit less self confident. During one of my discussions with Tope Rants (I really do appreciate you sis), she told me about how well I am doing and how important I also am in my space.
I would like to take this holiday to deeply value my brand for what it is, how far it has come, its current capability and how much of things it is still going to do.
I complain a lot. I am not going to lie about that. I grumble about slight failures, big disappointments, everything. I complain about how completely disappointed I am when I don’t meet my targets.
I want to use this holiday to begin to practise thankfulness. I want to reflect on how far I have come instead of how far I can go. I want to appreciate God more and constantly maintain a heart of gratitude.
What are your resolutions this holiday?