I try hard. Really try hard to be the nicest person you could ever meet. I try to be good, virtuous, 90% incorruptible, respectful, slow to vex and so on… But sometimes it just doesn’t pay. Sometimes it entirely sucks. And… Ugh.. How I wish it didn’t suck! I like being good. And it’s because I have a loud conscience. One single tiny bad act feels like I just murdered someone..
Ask any nice person out there how hard it is to stay nice and you’ll hear tales of sad experiences. Of people having tried to take advantage of them all because they’re such good and nice people. Some people even test your patience and temper. And you keep telling yourself to calm down. To not turn your flip side on them, to not show them your ugly side, which is what the person provoking you wants anyway. And I have come to realise that being nice doesn’t equate to you not being able to speak up for yourself. Because before, I used to let people get away with riding me. Because I thought speaking up made me a bad person. Yes, I was that naive… But trust life na.. It will teach you to toughen up. Life taught me to adjust.
So, if you are like me in those naive days, please always defend yourself. Don’t be dumb while trying to be nice. You’ll just be letting the other person take advantage of you. Instead, when someone keeps provoking you, stand up for yourself. You’re not being bad that way. You’re being good to yourself. You are standing up for yourself. And that my dear… Is super awesome.
So, why did I say being nice sucks? At least sometimes. Because let me be sincere, there are top advantages to being nice. But that’s for another day. So, some reasons why being nice sucks? Here are some. You will also see from the following reasons, that being nice and being good indeed has its cons..
1. People thinking you are totally incapable of getting annoyed.
So, they keep pushing and pushing your limits. But not for long, you are a human being and you’ll surely reach your breaking point. And at that point they’re screwed. Because, your anger is not a pretty sight to watch. At all… And whoever is the recipient of your angry lambasting, God help them. But, oh well, they called for it, now they have it.
2. People thinking you are too dumb.. And soft.
After all, who takes that much nonsense and doesn’t get annoyed? They are right to think you are dumb, after all… You never speak up. And you’re always trying to just be ‘nice’.
3. People keep stepping on your toes.
They keep doing things to annoy you just to see how far you can go with being nice. Before you finally snap and break like a rubber band..
4. People telling you this, “Aunty you sef! You are too nice joor..”
And you know that sentence is a low blow. It criticises who you are and what you cherish, that is, “being good”.
5. People telling you to, “go and toughen up! Be pana-sharp!”
And they go on like, ‘don’t be pana-dull o! Nigeria doesn’t allow for that..’ Meaning: Nigeria is not the place for too much nice-nice. Omo jara e mehn!
6. You discovering that, finding fellow nice people in Nigeria is the hardest task in the world.
Because the little number of nice people left, are scattered so scantily across the country, you’ll search miles just to find one. All the remaining originally nice people, have become fed up and gone into retirement. Or some are hiding.. Pretending to be stone hearted.
7. Living in Nigeria.
Sorry that I had to write that. But it is the truth. Nigeria embodies corruption in all its forms. That is, most Nigerians are so infected with corruption that they don’t know the meaning of “nice” anymore. Indeed, living in Nigeria is the worst dilemma for any person who genuinely wants to nice. Nigerians are all about “bribe your way in or find your way out…” Even the religious leaders have lost touch of what it means to be nice. :'(
Now you see why I said earlier that being nice can sometimes suck? Yeah.. Now you see. 🙂
But don’t lose hope just yet. Being nice is the best antidote to a poison like corruption and cruelty. Which means you are blessing to Nigeria if you are nice and good. Because you are an antidote to this poison that has spread! And, Nigeria needs more of you. Desperately.. Too much..
Wait.. How did this article become a talk about Nigeria? Oh well… Figure that out.
Gotta run… Bye!
Photo Credit: Naija Vibes